I'm Gonna Miss You | | Jordan

If you follow me on Facebook, you saw this video right after Emery passed. It is so special to us, and pretty personal. Some of these pictures will show you how sick Emery was & she looks pitiful, but in others it will show you her beauty. She was such a beautiful baby girl.

Emery's Tribute Video

But the main reason for sharing this video was I wanted you to hear the first song on it, I'm Gonna Miss You. It is written by her Daddy for his girls. I don't have another way to share it on my blog yet. (We need to get this song on iTunes and Amazon) But, listen to it. It is my favorite song Jordan has ever written.  

He wrote this song before we even got pregnant with Emery. We got pregnant with her in August and he wrote this in May. 

But I woke up to take Makenzi to school one morning and he said "I want you to listen to this song I wrote before you take Makenzi." 

He started it and I could feel the tears coming in my eyes. The next thing I know I am grabbing the first thing I can (a roll of paper towels) to wipe my tears away. I was crying my eyes out. 

Makenzi didn't understand why I was crying because she told us she was never going to leave us. She would always live with us and even if she didn't, she was going to be right next door to us. :-) Oh I can only hope, baby girl! 

The girls still love to listen to this song. They can sing every word with him. 

I can't thank the funeral home enough for putting this song on her tribute video. 

Since you guys all seem to like my post about Jordan than any one I had put up (it has over 500 views), I thought you might like to hear some of his music. 

He has other songs that he's written that are good & you can always find him downtown (well, on Tuesdays and Wednesdays at HonkyTonk Central and Friday and Saturday at Rippy's) playing some of your favorites or his favorites. If I am there, don't come ask me what his favorite song to sing is... I honestly do NOT know & yes, I'm his wife but we have other things to talk about than the songs he sings every day. ;-) 

Today was a stormy day here in Nashville... 

But you know what, Emery Hope showed up. We went out to eat for supper and as we were walking out we saw her. The girls went running towards the sunshine and said "Look!!! It's Baby Emery!" To see the sunshine rays/sunset/sunrise bring my girls the comfort makes me smile. 

Makenzi said she's seeing streets of gold. That's so awesome. But what we're seeing is beautiful, too, she said. Oh sweet girl, I can't wait for us to all see heaven. 

After dinner - it was off to Target because the girls had money burning holes in their pockets. They walked right in Target and got what they wanted. I haven't really seen them since their baths. They are in their room playing Barbies. 

And here's a sweet video Jordan took of Addison the other day when we were playing outside. This was the day she was "healed." ENJOY! She only slid down the big slide about 100 times and every single time she would make sure her Daddy was watching her & screamed like she was riding a roller coaster. Oh that sweet girl can melt our hearts! 

Always be present in your kids lives, they are only loaned to us. God will want them back one day. 

"Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it." Proverbs 22:6

Beautiful, Long Days

The last few days have been absolutely beautiful out. 

We have spent most of our afternoons, after school outside in the sunshine. 

It's been so nice!

The girls have loved every minute of it. 

We have played, they've ran with friends, colored with sidewalk chalk, rode their bikes... you name it, we've been outside enjoying the weather. 

Spring is a wonderful time! 

One afternoon while they were running and playing, I sat outside and did my bible study. It was so nice to be sitting out there reading my bible and listening to their laughter all over the playground. Amazing what a sense of calmness that gave me. 

An Addison story - ketchup. She LOVES ketchup. We were sitting in the school line having a snack like we do most days and she found a few packets of ketchup from Sonic in the glove box. She asked me to open them. I asked her why. She told me she needed them for her chips. She proceeded to eat all of her chips with a dab of ketchup on all of them. It was actually really cute. 

 Makenzi story - Oh my! She lost it one afternoon. She ran inside from playing outside all afternoon and went to the bathroom. Next thing I knew, she was saying "how do you like my lipstick?" to her Daddy and we cracked up. She had covered her face in lipstick. I guess that's a new way to wear it!!! :-) 

I've seen my sweet Emery painting the skies quite a bit this week. Oh I love it! It's such a sweet reminder that my sweet girl is living it up in heaven with our Lord. 

This morning a friend sent me this. I am so thankful for all the friends who constantly send me pictures of the sunsets or sunrises when they see Emery. They are thinking of me and my sweet girl and that sure helps me know I am thought of. 

It's been a Wednesday! It hasn't been awful. It's been 8 of them. Oh how I miss her - so much! I've just done more reading of my bible and more praying today. It seems to bring me so much peace. Plus, I know I have all of you lifting me up extra in prayer on Wednesday! I am forever grateful to you for that! 

Tomorrow is a rainy day - and the wind is already howling outside. I am looking forward to spending the afternoon inside with my girls tomorrow afternoon, possibly cuddled on the couch! I'm already dreaming of it - and it's only 10:30PM. 

Before I leave you, I want to share one of my favorite bible verses - 

John 20:29 "Jesus said to him (Thomas), "Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed."" 

Isn't that awesome!?! Think of his friends, his followers, his disciples... they watched him perform all the miracles, watched Him walk on water, watched Him come back to life... yet, they still had moments of doubt. So, blessed are we because we haven't seen Him yet we believe. Blessed! 

Easter 2016 | | Addison's Legs

Easter 2016 was a good day. 

We went to church together. But were late, as usual. I believe I will be late to my own funeral. Somehow, someway it will happen. 

As we were walking into church, Jordan was saying if he was walking in my shoes he would fall and kill himself. Before he could even finish his thought, Addison fell. I'm talking face plant into the concrete sidewalk. Her knees (both of them) are torn to pieces with concrete burn. 

I rush to carry her inside to get to someone to get us the first aid kit. Phyllis (our pastor's wife) and I take her into the bathroom to try to get her cleaned up. She will NOT let us put bandages on them. And she decides she needs to just sit with me in church instead of going to Children's Church. 

I finally make it into church right before Pastor Caryl gets on stage to have everyone turn to welcome someone. Remember those shoes Jordan was telling saying he would kill himself in - my feet are aching and I don't think I can stand anymore from running in them to care for Addison - so, I stay seated. (Sorry, to my church friends that I didn't turn around or mingle or say hi to anyone that wasn't in arms reach of me - lol). 

I sat the whole service, holding my sweet baby. You know what? As much as she needed me because her legs hurt (and only Mama can make that better), I needed her, too. I held my baby, and she sat so still in my lap. We sang songs and I cuddled her. It was needed for me. 

One of these days I may be able to make it through a church service or the Lord's Supper without crying but I don't see it happening anytime soon. We sang the Chris Tomlin song "I Will Rise" and I cried as I held and rocked Addison and sang the words to the song. All I could picture was my sweet Emery Hope when He called her name. It was her time, I wasn't ready to let her go but I know she was ready and I know God was ready for her to be HOME. He took her into her arms and there is no more sorrow or no more pain. (I cry through the Lord's Supper every week thinking of the sacrifice Jesus made for you and for me and the HOPE of eternity with HIM and my sweet Emery + the rest of my family but to see HIM and to see her again, oh what a day that will be and thank you just isn't adequate for my Lord). 

We came home to a cooked lunch. I had promised my girls I would make a Sunday dinner like Gramma does for them at our house. (My whole family decided that I need to make this a tradition, so looks like no more going out to eat on a Sunday.) 

I wanted pictures of us all after church. So, we went outside. 

Remember me telling you about Addison's legs. Well, she has refused to walk the whole day since her fall. She won't even stand for pictures. So, I carry her a chair out under the tree for her to sit in. But it took a while to get a smile out of her! 

Selfie Stick to the rescue - family picture! And Happy Addison because she is in someone's arms. 

Let me tell you - for two days! I repeat two days! She didn't walk. We carried her everywhere - from the couch to the chair, to the bed, to the toilet, to the car, in and out of the movies, up the stairs - you name it we carried her. Her poor little legs didn't touch the ground. And when she finally did touch the ground some, she limped like she had broken her leg off. We believe this is the first time she's really scraped her legs up. Heaven forbid, she really ever break a bone, we will have to get her a wheelchair.

We have laughed so hard at the things we did for this little girl. Carrying her like crazy to make sure those legs didn't hurt her. 

I even strategically placed blankets on her when she was cold two nights in a row so her legs wouldn't be under the blankets. 

Luckily, today (Tuesday) she is walking again... and actually underneath the blankets as we speak where her legs aren't bothering her. She declared today "I am healed." HA! Praise the Lord! Mama's arms are tired, I've been lifting 45 lbs all day every day to move her from place to place. 

Emery Hope showed up on Easter, too! I look looking out of my doors in the evenings before I shut the blinds and curtains and seeing this! Oh pink sunsets, you will never be nothing more than a reminder from God that Emery Hope is doing ok. I've never in my life seen so many PINK sunsets since February 3rd and all I can do is Thank HIM because I know they are from HIM. 

 What a wonderful day to celebrate our Risen KING! Other than Addison's mishap with her legs, we had a great day. And Addison's legs didn't stop us from having a great day, it really made our day more fun. We laughed the whole time. I've never seen a child act like she did over concrete burns on her legs, but she did. 

Wilderness in the Smokies

Sometimes you just need to get away. 

I had a rough week a few weeks ago. 

Jordan had the idea he wanted to just take me away to Gatlinburg or somewhere for a weekend. 

Neither of our parents could keep the girls, so we decided instead of just a couple get away, we would take the girls. 

It was probably the best decision we made.

We had an absolute blast.

I booked us a room for two nights at Wilderness in the Smokies with the indoor water park. The girls walked into our room and were immediately thrilled. They were ready to change in their swimsuits and hit the water park. 

We headed straight there. 

If you haven't been to the Wilderness in the Smokies in Sevierville, we highly recommend it. It was the best time. 

The water park indoors was so much fun. 

We rode slides (well, Makenzi & me, and Jordan & Makenzi...Addison would not ride the waterslide even in our laps), played in the wave pool, the heated indoor pool, and the kiddie playground with Addison. 

We took a picture with the moose that were in the hotel our first day there. :-) 

Every evening when we were finished with the water park, we would head to Pigeon Forge to eat & of course ride go-carts! My girls thought that was a must. 

Addison & I would ride together. Jordan & Makenzi would ride together. Addison didn't like riding in the big pack of people, so we would just fall to the back and then she would start telling me to go faster and faster but not when anyone could run into our go-cart. 

Makenzi on the other hand... the rougher the ride the better. She was yelling at her Daddy telling him to go faster, push that pedal all the way down as far as you can, and hit them and pass them... everything she could. She has a competitive spirit we saw this trip. She doesn't want to lose.

She got to drive the kiddie gocarts herself. Jordan raced her one night & she would get really mad if he would pass her. I laughed so hard during that race. She would be smiling ear to ear when she was in the lead and when he was in the lead she had a look that could kill. 

Addison wanted to ride the kiddie rides. She only rode the go-cart if I was driving. She could have driven some of the other small ones, but she decided she would just ride some of the rides they had out there. It was like a small fair. 

Our last day there, we checked out of the hotel and went to spend the day in Gatlinburg. 

We ate at the Pancake Pantry, which is delicious. 

 Then we went to the Aquarium, Ripley's Believe it or Not, and to the moving Ripley's theater. 

We had a great get away. I needed it. I needed some time away from home just to rejuvenate and spend some time with my favorite people.